My New Hero!

Posted By: Brad  //  Category: Boardman Views, Conservatism, Education, Family, Politics

Every once in a great while there appears a story on the front page of our local Everett paper, The Herald, that simply begs for a response.  This morning one of those appearances occurred.

Headline:  State Joins Health Act Suit

Washington State Attorney General Rob McKenna is to be placed appropriately upon a  pedestal and have his praises sung throughout this oppressed state!  Let Freedom Ring!

Though the other Washington has developed a chronic deafness when it comes to its ability to hear the voice of the majority, we will surgically (and without socialized medicine) remove the thick wax from her ears using the forceps of the law.  Dr. McKenna is moving this patient to the front of the Emergency Room line!

By means of a lawsuit, McKenna is joining attorneys general in nine other states to contest the constitutionality of the Obamanation being signed by the president today.

Obama and his gang continue to simply lay aside the Constitution of the United States whenever it suits their purposes.  In this case they are attempting to mandate that every American buy health insurance or face a fine.  Said McKenna, “They could mandate every American should eat one avocado a day and it wouldn’t be constitutional.  They don’t have the power.”

An immediate, vigorous, to-the-death fight is necessary and finally a battle cry from an elected Washingtonian is being raised.  Thank you, Mr. McKenna!  You are my new hero!

As if that were not good news enough, Dr. McKenna is joining the surgery without consulting Queen Christine!  The Governor (term used lightly) is apparently turning three shades of purple over this thing and has purportedly been heard screaming through the hallways of the Capitol Building:  Off with his head!  Off with his head!

Whenever, I hear news of Christine Gregoire being outraged about something, a soothing calm flows down over me and I lean back in my recliner and smile…or giggle…or just think happy thoughts because in those moments I know someone…somewhere…is doing something…right!

You’re in Boardman Country!

Make yourself at home,

Brad

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Inhale! Now Exhale! Hold It! Now, Off To The Carwash!

Posted By: Brad  //  Category: Boardman Views, Care Giving, Conservatism, Family, Humor, Politics

Some folks might just get frustrated and move.

I, however, am not one of them.

I have determined to remain perfectly content and subservient even after having read Wednesday’s article by Holley Gilbert of The Oregonian entitled “Washington May Wipe Out Driveway Car Washing.”

After all, Queen Christine and her minions up on Mt. Olympia have proven time and time again that they know what’s best for all mankind.  Certainly, when her inevitable edict comes to my town I will be the first of her loyal subjects to obediently put away my hose, bucket and chamois, get into my car and drive down to the carwash, that is, if she thinks it’s still okay to have a clean car by then.

I wish she could have been my mommy and that the state Department of Ecology’s Bill Moore could have been my daddy.  Just think, all these years I could have still been having my diaper changed for me!  They just probably didn’t know that back when I was very little I learned how to be a big boy and go pee-pee and poo-poo all by myself.

I know that I still need lots of help to think the right…uhhh…left way, but I keep wondering why my big brothers on the  state Pollution Control Hearings Board are bothering to have a “hearing” in October if they’ve already decided “to uphold the state’s ability to exceed federal standards.”  Hmmm.  I guess I’ll have to ask them that when I grow up.

So, I’m very happy that the smart people in Washington are “protecting” me from myself.  But the only thing I still get a little sceeered about is what if someday they accidentally forget to remind me not to pick my nose, or…to…inhale?

I bet I’ll feel better when we have an Obama Nation to watch over us.

You’re in Boardman County!

Make yourself at home and be sure to breathe,

Brad

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